Categories
Asia

How come Korean girls don’t date Chinese guys?

This is a question I have wondered about for a long time. It would seem to be a perfect pairing on paper.

Chinese guys get a girl who is not as strong as Chinese girls are (generally), do more for them around the house, give gifts or pay for things in return, do not expect a dowry when marrying, and are generally more feminine and care more about their appearance as well. In addition, there’s no historical baggage or issues like there would be if it was a Japanese girl.

Korean girls get a guy who arguably does as much as or more for them than Korean guys will, plus will do housework, cooking and taking care of the baby as well (a lot of Korean guys do not do this). Also, its arguable they dont have as much pressure to dress up or do makeup or look perfect all the time with Chinese guys compared to Korean guys.

But in practice while I was living in Korea, I noticed very few Korean girls with Chinese men (granted, it could be hard to tell these couples apart from a typical Korean couple), and even the Korean girls I met who had studied in China before as exchange students and met me to practice their Chinese, surprisingly did not date any Chinese guys in China (they still dated their Korean bfs long distance, or remained single).

So why is this? Why do Korean women stick to Korean guys or even prefer to date white men over Chinese men?

I think I finally narrowed it down to a few reasons, after asking many Korean girls this question over the years (me being of Chinese ethnicity myself, have a horse in the race so to speak):

  1. Korean women prefer to date men who can share their language and culture. This in fact is the reason why most races date their own race – but its especially true for Korean women because of how conservative their society is. Koreans in general are not known to be the type to really take risks or ‘be different’ as their society rewards a conformist way of thinking. Simply put, Korean women date Korean men because they are the most comfortable for them, they can communicate better with them, they don’t like to try new things, they want to be like every other Korean, and/or their parents are very conservative and don’t like them to date outside their race.
  2. Korean women don’t have an opportunity to know how Chinese men are like. They do know how Korean men are like. Plus the influence of Kdramas and Kpop really do help Korean men out a lot. Chinese men have no such entertainment vehicle to promote themselves. The CCP is focused on their domestic economy and are not interested to spread their culture to foreigners like Koreans do. That plus the whole censorship thing means that Chinese dramas + movies + music will likely never be popular in Korea the same way Korean music/movies/dramas are popular worldwide, and in China. This means however sweet and caring Chinese men are in reality, Korean women and other women have no idea. Instead, they have the idea that Korean men are like that because of all the dramas and such. Soft power really makes a difference here.
  3. Chinese men like to stick to their race. Ask any Chinese guy who are the prettiest girls and they will likely say Chinese girls. They won’t say Korean girls. This is because Chinese people are fiercely nationalistic and prefer their own race, but also because just like how Korean men are hyped up in Korean media, Chinese women are hyped up in Chinese media – Chinese women are promoted in their own country the same way Korean men are promoted in their country. In addition – they have the mistaken notion that all Korean women did plastic surgery (which is false, as I have explained in my previous answers many times). What you have as a result is a curious reversal of states here: Korean women and Chinese men, while on paper being the perfect fit for each other, instead remain loyal to their race, while Korean men and Chinese women – not so much. Korean men are in general just intrigued by any girl who is pretty, Korean or not. And Chinese women are lured by those Korean dramas/hype that promote Korean men, as well as men who have more money obviously. Of course on paper Korean men and Chinese women seem like the relationship will not work out very well as they are both ‘strong’ types but in reality there are more Korean men-Chinese women relationships than Korean women-Chinese men relationships, as baffling as that sounds.

But Tong, if 1) and 2) are true, why do I see a lot of Korean women marrying Western guys (i.e white men)?
This is exactly related to 1) and 2) actually.
1) Korean women who want to buck the conformist trend or don’t like the traditional Korean culture see white men as the exact opposite of Korean culture – they think Chinese men are still somewhat Confucian and a ‘halfway point’ between Korean men and Western men – why go halfway when you can go all the way to a culture thats totally different from Korean culture?
And 2) white men are heavily promoted by Hollywood and American pop music – again, media influence / soft power matters and white men have generally been the recipient of a very powerful media presence, the American media, which spreads globally. That’s why white men can generally get any girl, anywhere – America, Europe, Asia, etc without any issues.

Of course this is all my theory on why I don’t see more Chinese men – Korean girl couples even though it makes more sense for these two to be together, why in reality, we don’t actually see this being the case.
However, I will note that the few times I have seen Korean girls date Chinese men – they are usually Taiwanese or Hong Kongers. The reason for this I would assume, is that Taiwanese guys and Hong Kong guys can speak english better than mainland Chinese guys can – and they are not as fiercely nationalistic as mainland Chinese guys are either. Also, they have a generally better ‘image’ in Korea than mainlanders do (which is caused by the bad Chinese tourist stereotype).

 

Categories
General

Are there Korean guys as handsome as BTS or EXO in Korea?

Very very few.

I’m not saying this because I’m a guy but because in Korea, there are simply way more attractive women than men as a result of the gender inequality in the country and more focus on appearance there is more pressure for women to look good than men. Korean men don’t have to do makeup (although some do its a minority), they don’t have to wear short skirts in the winter (as Korean high school girls do) or high heels (as Korean female workers do) or do plastic surgery (as many Korean women do) or paint their nails or do any of that other stuff.

As a result, this leads to quite a few couples on the street you can see where the woman is simply way more attractive than her boyfriend/husband.

I see more ‘balanced’ attractiveness in other countries. China, Taiwan, Canada, USA etc in general the girl might be equal or prettier on average but not by a lot and in some cases uglier. In Korea, I almost never see a handsome guy with an ugly girl, its quite rare to see that.

The guys like BTS or EXO is like 1 out of 500 I think in Korea. Now, the girls like SNSD or Red Velvet or AOA something like that is more like 1 out of 50 in Korea. Just to show you the difference. Its just way more common to see a pretty girl than a handsome guy. Handsome guys in Korea as a result, can get pretty much most girls they desire. Pretty girls on the other hand, might still struggle to find a good guy.

They have much more success abroad. Most of my Korean female friends told me when they go to China or America the number of guys that hit on them go up by at least 5 times. An ‘average’ girl in Korea (who cannot get a handsome guy in Korea) would be considered quite above average in other countries, due to high appearance standards in Korea. The irony is, ‘average guys’ in Korea (who are able to get attractive girls in Korea) are not particularly more popular in other countries especially in America because American women generally don’t care about Asian men the same way American men care about Asian women.

My advice is Korean women should go abroad to find guys, while Korean men should stay in their country. They have the best chances to meet the guy/girl they want that way.

Categories
General

Korean fashion style

One of the things I love most about Korean people is how much they care about fashion and how they dress. Their style is IMO much better looking than American or other Asian styles that I’ve seen so far. It seems almost every Korean girl cares about appearance and how they look. For guys, a lower percentage do, but still many guys do as well. So I want to write about what I’ve seen, since I care about appearance and I often notice how both guys and girls dress and look like here. Korea is also a very homogeneous country, and also very conformist so the same style of skirt or pants that you see on one person you might see several times a day. With that said lets move on to these different styles. I’ll start with guys since there’s less to talk about with them.

Men (20s-30s)
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Head / Face / Makeup

Common Korean hairstyle for men
Common Korean hairstyle for men
-Most Korean men don’t dye their hair (some do, but not as common as Korean girls do), keeping it black.
-They prefer to have the bangs go down over their forehead like the picture above.
-Medium length hair is very common (in contrast to Chinese guys who have very short spiky hair, and Japanese guys who sometimes have longer hair reaching down to their neck).
-Most Korean men don’t wear makeup (although some do, its definitely the minority).
-Maybe 50% or so of Korean men did lasik surgery or wear contacts, as Koreans in general do not like wearing glasses compared to other Asians.
-Korean men fully shave their facial hair (in contrast to other Asian men who may keep a stubble or facial hair of some sort).

Top clothing

Tight collar shirt, fully buttoned, with rolled up sleeves or exposed arms
Tight collar shirt, fully buttoned, with rolled up sleeves or exposed arms
-Koreans love tight clothing. One of the most common fashion styles for top-wear is to wear a collar shirt, fully buttoned, with either rolled up sleeves or exposing the arms. See above picture for example.

Striped shirts are very common, for both young boys and girls
Striped shirts are very common, for both young boys and girls
-Young Korean guys and girls, especially couples, love to wear striped shirts, as seen in the picture above. One reason is that they can match it easily to form couple clothing.

Tight Blazer for a fancy date
Tight Blazer for a fancy date
-For Older men and fancy occasions, a tight Blazer is a good choice for a fancy date or a good night out.
-Koreans tend not to wear ties outside of work.

These are the three most common styles of fashion for top wear that I’ve seen on Korean men.

Bottom clothing

Skinny Jeans
Skinny Jeans

More tight pants
More tight pants
-Skinny Jeans or Tight Khakis. Those are the most common items that I’ve seen. Keep it tight, keep it simple.
-In the summer, tight cargo shorts are very common like in the striped shirts picture above.

Shoes

For more special occasions
For more special occasions

These are more similar to the everyday type that you can wear
These are more similar to the everyday type that you can wear
-Running shoes (Converse type), Loafers (like the pic above) are very common for everyday occasions.
-For fancy occasions, Oxford type or similar shoes can be worn.
-A lot of Korean guys, and me included, don’t wear socks with our shoes for casual occasions.

Accessories

Korean glasses style
Korean glasses style
-Usually Korean men do not wear any hats.
-Very few guys do tattoos or piercings.
-As mentioned before maybe half of all Korean guys wear glasses. They prefer to wear oversized frames, with the shape more roundish than square (Westerners often prefer wearing square frames to round frames).
-Korean guys like to wear watches. Invest in a good classy looking mechanical watch.

Women (20s-30s)
————————————————————–

This section is going be longer because women care about their appearance and fashion more, so I can’t say every kind of fashion but I will try to list the most common styles I’ve seen.

Head / Face / Makeup

Typical Korean hair, dyed brownish-red and reaches to the shoulder or past
Typical Korean hair, dyed brownish-red and reaches to the shoulder or past
-50% of Korean women dye their hair, usually to brown or reddish-brown tint.
-They don’t like to leave their hair up. Most Korean girls let their hair down.
-Hair is medium length (down to shoulders) or longer (down past the shoulders). There are very few girls who have short hair who are not in high school.
-Perm/Bleach is also fairly common.

Korean makeup; lots of eyeliner, lots of pale foundation, red lipstick
Korean makeup; lots of eyeliner, lots of pale foundation, red lipstick
-Almost every Korean girl wears makeup (in contrast to Chinese girls who don’t wear makeup). The typical Korean girl puts on lots of eyeliner, lots of foundation or BB Cream to make their skin look paler, slight blush on their cheeks and red lipstick, like in the picture above. They also wear fake eyelashes sometimes.

Another typical makeup example.
Another typical makeup example.
-Makeup is the single most important thing that changes a girls appearance. Most Korean girls who do plastic surgery do it to get double eyelids instead of single eyelids. But that doesn’t make as noticeable a difference as makeup does. Makeup literally makes their eyes look twice as big as before. The example above shows typical lots of eyeliner to make the eye look bigger, as well as lots of foundation and BB cream to make the skin look paler and cover up imperfections.
-Note that some girls even put makeup on other parts of their body like their legs to hide imperfections.
-Korean girls shave every part of their body, and this needs to be mentioned because some Asians like Chinese girls do NOT shave every part of their body. Yes this includes the upper lip area as well, and a lot of girls prefer to get things lasered instead, so they don’t have to deal with shaving.
-Most Korean girls paint their fingernails and/or toenails. Especially if they are wearing toe-open heels or shoes.
-Most Korean girls get braces for their teeth. (I have to mention this to contrast it to Japanese girls who are known for having crooked teeth).

Top clothing

-Young girls like to wear the striped shirt (as shown above)

Typical Korean blouse
Typical Korean blouse

Shoulderless shirt
Shoulderless shirt
-I cannot list all the types of blouses a Korean girl wears, but the above is an example of the type of blouse an older Korean girl would wear. They are usually very feminine and sometimes transparent to show off their arms or chest. The shoulderless shirt is another type of clothing older women wear a lot as well.

One type of one piece; this one is shoulderless
One type of one piece; this one is shoulderless

another one piece type with straight hem
another one piece type with straight hem
-This technically classifies as both top and bottom wear but, Korean girls love to wear dresses, and while I cannot list every single type of dress they wear, I’ve given three examples above of one piece dresses. They like to wear shoulderless types, semi-transparent types, frilly or flare bottoms, straight bottoms, etc.

Another type of one piece
Another type of one piece with frilly hem and top covered with a jacket

typical long coat used to cover their top
typical long coat used to cover their top
-Because Korean girls think showing top or their chest is considered more sexy than showing bottom, they often cover the top of their body with a long coat or or jacket while wearing a one piece or skirt underneath.

Bottom clothing

-As I said, Korean girls love to show wear dresses and generally like to show their legs since its (for some reason) not considered sexy at all to show legs in Korea. Thus Korean girls love to wear short skirts and short shorts as well in addition to dresses.

Typical short skirt in Korea (yes this is typical)
Typical short skirt in Korea (yes this is quite common!)

A flare skirt, so named because the hem flares out
A flare skirt, so named because the hem flares out

A typical A-line skirt or Pencil skirt as many office girls would wear
A typical A-line skirt or Pencil skirt as many office girls would wear
-Once again I’m not going to list all the different types of skirts that I’ve seen, there’s too many, but there’s some common ones above. Young girls tend to wear flare skirts (or tennis skirt), while older girls wear pencil skirts or A line skirts, sometimes with slits cut in the back.

A transparent dress worn over a short skirt
A transparent dress worn over a short skirt
-Though not as common as the other types of dresses, sometimes Korean girls wear these transparent types of dresses with a short skirt of shorts underneath.

Typical hot pants
Typical hot pants

typical jean shorts
typical jean shorts
-Since Korean girls love to wear anything that shows their legs off, the shortest pants imaginable are called “hot pants” and often worn in the summer or going clubbing, though some girls wear them day to day. Young girls sometimes wear short exercise shorts or jean shorts. No they don’t exercise in them, they just wear it because it shows a lot of leg.

-Skinny jeans. Though they are in the minority compared to the dresses/skirts.

koreans like to wear stockings in the winter
koreans like to wear stockings in the winter
-While in the summer Korean girls bare their legs, in the colder months they tend to wear stockings in lieu of pants (again because they like to show their legs), either nude/transparent pantyhose or black stockings. I don’t have a picture of transparent pantyhose because, well, they just look like skin from a distance since they “skin colored”.

Shoes

Typical platforms a young Korean girl would wear
Typical platforms a young Korean girl would wear

Platform sandals or runners
Platform sandals or runners
-Young Korean girls prefer to wear either high heeled sandals, platform shoes or running shoes (Converse or Vans is popular as several photos above attest)

typical High heels
typical High heels

typical black high heeled shoes
typical black high heeled shoes
-Older Korean girls wear platform shoes, high heeled shoes or stilettos (sometimes very high)

Accessories

-No glasses. 90% of Korean girls don’t wear glasses (in contrast to other Asians who often do). They do lasik surgery or wear contacts instead.
-Very few girls do tattoos or non ear piercings.
-Earrings are common, but not on every girl. Some wear them, some don’t. I’ve seen about 50/50 on this.
-Necklaces also common, and also a 50/50.
-Watches also common (in contrast to Westerners who don’t commonly wear watches anymore). I’ve seen more Korean girls wear watches than not, though not as commonly as Korean men do.

Ankle bracelet
Ankle bracelet
-A peculiar feature of Korean fashion is the ankle bracelet. Because so many girls show their legs in Korea, they like to “spice up” their look by wearing these on their leg.

So yeah… that’s about it for now. Since Koreans care so much about appearance, I felt compelled to make this post about Korean fashion 🙂 The overall theme of Korean fashion seems to be “Neat and Clean” style and I think it looks way better than fashion in other parts of the world IMO.