Do Chinese men, in general, prefer typical Chinese girls or do they like women with different assets and features?

Chinese women are pretty varied in terms of features and ‘assets’. Xinjiang girls, Manchurian girls, Guangdong girls, Hong Kong girls, Sichuan girls, Beijing/Tianjin girls, Jiangnan girls, etc can all be very different. If you are talking about nationality, most of my Chinese friends would be open to Korean, Taiwanese, and maybe Vietnamese girls as well. But probably not Japanese as a matter of principle.

Taiwanese girl:

Korean girl:

Vietnamese girl:

These other nationalities (yes I know Taiwan is not technically a “country” but they are ROC nationality) are close enough to Chinese beauty standards and have similar cultural values (they are all Confucian based) that I think most Chinese guys would be open to dating them as well 🙂

What do you think of Chinese girls, and how they appear to foreigners?

Very different from other East Asian girls. This question is loaded so of course my answer will be slightly generalizing, but I think for the majority of Chinese girls I met I seem to get this impression:

While Taiwanese/Korean/Japanese girls tend to be traditionally feminine, passive, more dependent on men, Chinese girls are more independent, more dominant, more aggressive, and more money focused. They value their career and success more than anything else. They don’t focus as much on physical appearance as much as owning expensive brand name items (this might be due to the Chinese “face” culture which I hate).

Also, a lot of them appear to me slightly arrogant about themselves. They think that Chinese women are the most beautiful ‘natural’ looking women, certain regions like Sichuan or Chongqing etc have the best looking women, Korean women are fake, etc. I’ve never heard or met a Korean girl who bragged about their race like that. I’ve never heard them say something like ‘oh Seoul/Busan has the best looking women, we are better looking than Chinese women’ etc. Chinese women are very confident, sometimes overconfident I think, whereas other Asian girls seem to be more humble and insecure.

Also, in a surprising twist of gender inequality, they seem to have more power than the men do. While in other patriarchal countries the men have more power than the women and the women have to do more for the men, in China its reversed: the men have to do more for the women. That means despite Chinese women almost making as much as men do, the men still have to pay for everything and do everything for the women. How did this come to be? I think communism + the skewed gender ratio are to blame.

This is just my opinion of Chinese girls from mainland. Chinese-American or Chinese-Canadian girls are very different and are closer to Western women.

What is the most difficult thing you’ve had to do in your life?

For me this is the most difficult thing I’ve done – am doing because I still haven’t succeeded yet.
All my life I’ve been generally a shy person. it was hard for me to talk to people and it was hard for me to engage in conversation. In high school I didn’t have any female friends. In University I was basically deep in my studies all the time and didn’t have much time to socialize.
After university, I immigrated to California and began working. That’s the first time I met Korean friends. Having been raised in a Chinese household and made mostly Chinese friends during university, I always thought Koreans were similar to Chinese. **I was very wrong. **The first time I visited Korea in 2013 – **I found out that Koreans and Chinese are actually totally different from each other. **I just didn’t realize this before because Korean Canadians and Chinese Canadians were actually quite similar.
Around this time I had my first Korean gf: She was beautiful, she was sweet and she was loving. And I made many Korean female friends, and I found all of them to be quite good looking and sweet to their bfs. I also found out that I may have a genetic preference for Korean women all along – their deeply Confucian culture was a much better fit for me than modern Chinese culture was, and I was attracted to how they looked, how they dressed, the way they acted, how feminine they were, and Korean culture and mannerisms in general.
I realized that all the girls in my life that I’ve been attracted to – have either been Korean all along or have exhibited Korean characteristics. Having realized this attraction, **I made it a personal goal to marry a Korean woman – **and buried my head deep in Korean language books to improve my Korean.
For 2 years from 2012 to 2014, I studied Korean history, culture and grammar really hard and finally improved my Korean to a level that I would consider ‘conversationally fluent’. Then I had to change my job. I quit my job and changed to a job that allowed me to work remotely. The problem was, I still had work the same time zone as my California team members. Oh well.
In 2014 I moved to Korea not knowing if I could even get a place to stay there. I managed to get a place and a bank account using just my passport. And for 2 years I worked like a vampire – sleeping during the daytime and working during 1am to 9am (the hours were exactly opposite California and Korea). It put a heavy toll on my body. I only ate convenience store food during this time so it was very unhealthy. I lost more than 10kg during this time. All this so that I could have a *chance* of dating a Korean girl to fulfill my goal.
I failed. 2 years came and went, and even though I tried my best to meet Korean women – I never found one that really liked me enough to immigrate with me back to Canada. I had exhausted so many options. I tried Tinder, I tried all the online conversation exchange apps. I tried going to various language meetups. None of the girls I met from there had any interest in me.
Why I wondered? Why did Korean girls hate me so much when I sacrificed so much for them? Why did white guys have such success dating them and me as an Asian-Canadian have so little? I spoke Korean much better than the typical foreigner. I was not that bad looking by my own standards (after all I see uglier Korean guys dating pretty girls everywhere). I tried my best to dress like a Korean and have manners like a Korean. And yet I still failed. Many times I thought about giving up this dream but I couldn’t. I knew I was better than this. I knew that I had a chance but was missing something.
Then I realized – its because of my inexperience with relationships. I didn’t have that many relationships before, and my chronic shyness killed any chances of a Korean girl liking me. Firstly, it must be said that Korea is a very conservative country – and a lot of – if not the majority – of Koreans only date with other Koreans. I was rejected by a lot of women just for not being a Korean. Secondly, they prefer foreigners who looked white. As a Chinese-Canadian I was at a disadvantage. Thirdly – I was not experienced at dealing with women and way too shy. Korean women – like any women – like guys with confidence. I had very little confidence in myself and very little self esteem. I couldn’t understand why so many jerks ended up with all the women and nice guys like me got nothing.
So I tried to better myself. After my 2 years was up, I was forced to come back to the US and find another job for the time being to save up money. But make no mistake, I am still working on this goal and I still plan to move back to Korea sometime to find the right girl. This time I’ll be more experienced. And hopefully succeed. As long as I had the determination – this goal was the one driving purpose in my life. I really had dedicated the last 5 years of my life to it – and I was determined to succeed. Yes I know its an uphill battle. Yes, I know it would be easier to marry a Chinese or Thai or Filipino or whatever. But that’s not the point of life is it? If I took the easy way out.. it would be an admission of defeat and there would be no sense of satisfaction and I *still* wouldn’t be happy – because I knew that I (being of Manchu ancestry) had a genetic attraction to Korean women. And from other answers on Quora I read that Chinese male – Korean female relationships often ended up in disaster.. I was determined to be the one who can make it succeed.
So by God, this will be the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. Graduating from a top school in Canada? been there done that. Moving to California and getting a job in Silicon Valley was peanuts. Learning Korean was a cakewalk. Marrying a Korean girl – with mutual attraction – as a Chinese Canadian – now that is the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do. And I’m still working on it.